I need to BREATH! Trapped is the first word that comes to mind, frustration another, and the list goes on. Trapped, frustrated, suffocated, angered, inadequate, ______, _______, ________. You fill in the blanks! Itâ€™s the end of the summer and everyone has an agenda. This oneâ€™s going away to college for the first time and is nervous, that oneâ€™s going away to high school and hates all the rules. “We need to go here, we need to go there , we need need need” andâ€¦ â€œwe need your carâ€ and even better â€œwe need your attentionâ€. Â Itâ€™s everything and anything. Then thereâ€™s the new technology. Â â€œOh, you need to talk with me? Just send me a text.â€ Â Iâ€™ve five million things to do and canâ€™t seem to get anything done. Iâ€™ve got so many needy people NEEDING me! Yes, I get itâ€¦ Iâ€™m the MAMA, they’ve got my love. Iâ€™m fulfilled and overwhelmed, all at the same timeâ€¦ Â but itâ€™s nice when someone makes me a sandwich occasionally. Did I mention that I LOVE GIFTS?
The other day I got a book in the mail, â€œPink Hair and Chocolateâ€, written by Laura Lavigne my mentor and friend. She is an inspiration to me. Out of the blue, she sent it to me. It was such a wonderful random act of kindness and love. How did she know I needed just that? Â On the cover is a half eaten chocolate cookie. I want that cookie!! (Kosher of course.)
In this society we are taught that self-centered is selfish. â€œItâ€™s better to give than to receiveâ€… weâ€™ve all hear that one. â€œGive and youâ€™ll be a better person.â€ Â I challenge those statements.
There has to be a balance of giving and receiving. As a woman, a wife and a mother, if all I do is giveâ€¦ what am I teaching those around me. If I donâ€™t also take for myself, how will they understand that learning how to receive is as important as learning how to give? Receiving humbles us; it teaches us to be open to others; it teaches us love. Â Love to others and love to ourselves. If we love ourselves, we love others. Â There has to be a balance.
Today I am going to take better care of myself. Today I am going to let others know when their demands are too much. Today I am going to learn to say no. Easy for me to write, hard for me to initiate. So I think Iâ€™ll begin with â€œbaby stepsâ€â€¦Iâ€™ll learn some balance, when to say yes and when to say no and maybe Iâ€™ll even start a schedule for myselfâ€¦ or maybe not.