Going Beyond

It’s the middle of the night in Minnesota and I’m wide awake. I’ve alot on my mind; too many things to do and maybe I’m a bit nervous. Rosh Hashana is coming next week, the start of the Jewish New Year. I am leaving with my kids to California, and will be very busy packing, traveling, settling in, and then cooking for 100 plus students; another challenge, another hurdle…

My life has been full of challenges and hurdles these past few months. It’s been amazing to experience and also scary. Over the last year, I’ve quit a job, gone back to school, gotten a degree, started a business…and the list goes on. Last week I tested for my red belt in martial arts. I’m really proud of that. I’m another step closer to my black belt. I am not alone though. I have the support of my friends and family. It’s important that we utilize those around us for both support and butt kicking.

Why am I doing these things? I’m at a point in my life where I need to let go of the fear that’s holding me back from living my life to its fullest. As I mentioned in my last blog, Courage, I am not a very adventurous type. I realized though, that by doing the opposite of what I thought was my nature, I could gain more self confidence and feel more fulfilled. Is it an easy thing I do? Not at all. I still have some self-doubt, but the difference is that I am using my self-doubt as a catalyst to move myself forward into the place I want to be, by turning it around and by taking one step at a time. I use “tools” that move me in the direction I have chosen to go. I am learning to declutter my physical and mental surroundings, I am purposely speaking in a more positive way, thus changing my thought patterns, and most importantly, I am allowing myself to trust ME. I am moving towards a more authentic ME.

At some point in our lives, we have to allow ourselves to take chances, to go beyond our comfort zone. If we don’t, how can we ever grow emotionally and spiritually, and then in turn, discover who we really are? Every new experience starts with a first step. That’s all it takes.

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